Friday, January 7, 2011

It's a long walk to the yoga mat

I walk through the door completely spent.  While I do love my job, there are days when asking the same five questions, ringing up groceries and showing a cheery smile for eight hours becomes too much.  And when one does it several days in a row--well, that is something.  Exercising is not necessarily what I care to do once I get home from a long day.

As I change into my stretchy pants and tank top, I think "Is this really what I want to be doing?  Couldn't  I just sit and watch some TV, drink wine and be happy?"  I fight off these thoughts, telling myself that this really is what I want to be doing.  Of course I could be happy--at the moment.  However the next day would be something quite unlike happiness.  It would be full of regret, of a full tummy and aching head.  Full of a very bad attitude.   I've made promises to myself to care for my body, to do better.  But that promise is one that is hard to keep even when I am fully aware of the consequences if I don't.

Meeting myself on the mat is sometimes the most difficult journey I make during the day.  I am often exhausted, irritable, aching and hungry.  But as a trudge along, reaching for the bag hanging on the hook in my hallway, I know that what I am doing goes far beyond physical fitness.  This is symbolism of what I have chosen for my year.  Of routine, emotional awareness, and strength of mind and body.  It shows that regardless of how I feel, I will continue to follow through.

I begin in Child's Pose

Breathe in, breathe out...


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